Jeremy Clarkson manages to open his Diddly Squat restaurant

Gavin Hanly 11 July 2022

Jeremy Clarkson has been doing rather well out of his Diddly Squat Farm in the Cotswolds. Not only has the show about the farm been a massive hit on Amazon Prime, but his farm shop has been doing pretty good business too.

The presenter had been talking up the possibility of starting up a restaurant on the farm ever since the success of the show but, up until now, he'd been met with a series of refusals from the local planning committee. However, now The Sun is reporting that he's found a way around that.

It's not actually clear what that loophole is, but you can indeed book now on Opentable (tables for four do seem to be available and only this week for now). There, in a blurb which certainly looks like it's been written by Clarkson, (after explaining that it's mainly outside and to expect it to be "rustic"), he says "On the upside, the view is enormous and almost everything you eat was grown or reared on our farm, so it’s fresh with minimal food miles. There is no menu as such - we simply serve what’s available that day. But worry not, your table will be given a selection of snacks and starters followed by a roast and a pudding. Our bread, made with Hawkstone lager is absolutely brilliant." They're even selling English sparkling wine.

It's also been reported that the chef is Hicce's Pip Lacey and that, at the moment, there's an NDA that prevents anyone from talking about the restaurant apart from The Times, who ran a full feature about the opening. But a look on the farm's own Facebook page shows Lacey on site and reveals a menu featuring:

Snacks: sticky beef croquettes with aioli and pickled chilli, baby beef pasties with raspberry and salsa verde and grilled courgettes with bone marrow.
Sharing starters: Beef tartare and smoked brisket with egg ceviche.
Roasted topside of beef with vegetables
Diddly Squat strawberries and honey with local ice cream

What there isn't, is a vegetarian option, a fact made clear by a neon sign stating: "Yes, we have no vegetarian food."

Expect Clarkson to be talking it up in the Sunday Times soon and it will definitely be on the next series of Clarkson's Farm (which we've heard won't actually be aired until 2023). Will The Sunday Times also decide to send their own reviewer Marina O'Loughlin for a look (once the cameras have gone obviously, to preserve her anonymity)? We'll have to wait and see...